I was 7 years old standing in the courtyard wearing a bright blue dress with white stripes, socks up to my knees and black shoes. My hair was in a high ponytail. Santa Maria Goretti, a beautiful, all-girl, Catholic school was located in a quite street in Guayaquil, Ecuador. Unlike other schools in the town it had a big campus with two buildings. The walls were painted a brilliant sky blue. Beautiful pink flowers were found in pots in each corner of the hallways. Its classrooms had green walls and huge windows through which we heard the noise of the traffic on Capital Nagera Street. As I looked around the courtyard I saw girls, some my age and some older. I looked back and I saw my mother waving at me under the banner reading "Welcome Gorettinas." My first day at the School of Santa Maria Goretti had started.Jacqueline, stay focused on Ms. Irrizary; the other teacher do not matter to your story. What do you remember when you first met her? Was wrote you wrote here your first impression of her? As I walked slowly and nervously to my assigned classroom I saw Ms. irrizary, very petite with red hair and glasses, wearing her classic skirt with collar shirt everyday to work, had something no other teacher has showed me. While she looked weak, she really wasn't she was strong and had a lot of courage.You might want to rewrite the above sentence. It reads like you were disappointed in her, that she did not have courage and strength. She knew how to manage the 60 girls in the classroom. Her tone was very calm and sweet. We all learned equally from Science to English just from her we also learned self discipline and to respect and treat everyone how we want to be treated. She would have time for each and every one of us, remembering our birthdays and caring about every single step we took throughout our years in Santa Maria Goretti. You need to provide your reader with a specific example of Ms. Irrizary's strength and courage. Think again about making a movie of your experience. What would the viewer see? Think about starting your description of the school in the Bronx the same way you started your description of the school in Guayaquil. How did you look? Where were you standing? What did the school look like? Paint me a picture. loud, obnoxious and rude is how I would describe my classroom for the first time in Bronx, New york. "take your seats everyone, the lesson is about to start", His voice sounded stressed and tired but with a whole lot of experience, he was tall and scary looking, at that moment I just wanted to return to my sweet old country. Judging the book by its cover is what I did , Mr Ramos had a strong attitude. The above information needs to be broken up into separate sentences. You have a major run-on sentence!! He showed me how to stand up for what I really want and knowing that I was a young girl coming from a different country he understood my position " ohhhhhh mine, I was in your shoes one day, don't let go of that discipline and education you got over there not everyone is that lucky, I see you have been thought very well, you a very bright young lady" When and where did he say this to you? What was the situation? Further explanation is needed here. I will never forget this words they've made me the young lady I am today. I remembered all those words Mr.Ramos said and all the things Ms.Irrizary did for me and only those things will get me through the days at PS.60.
You might want to emphasize a little more what were the things you learned from each of the teachers. What do you take from them that you want to become when you are a teacher?
On my steps to becoming a Early childhood Education teacher I will apply this skills, I want to be just like them other than bringing diversity I want to bring change to the Education field. This two teachers from different countries shaped who I want to be in the future, I want my students to learn more than just English and math. I want them to learn all about discipline and respect. Why is discipline and respect so important for elementary-school students to learn? What specifically are you taking from Ms. Irrizary and whar specifically are you taking from Mr. Ramos? Again, more description is needed here. As I got older I understood that respect and discipline give you alot of advantages in life, I want to be able to pass it around to kids being that at a very young age kids should be leaning all this things in school so they can learn how to cherish them and keep them forever. My school years at Santa Maria Goretti in Guayaquil, Ecuador and PS.60 made me see education in a different way.
Born in Florida in 1993 and taken to the beautiful country of Ecuador in October of that year, educated there until the age of 9. I came to New York for my first time, with a lot of dreams and hopes, but with a lot of fear. Thinking, how will i adapt to this new life that i was about to start? Growing up in Ecuador and going to school over there made me different from a child being raised here in the United States. I was raised in a unique way in which manners, family and education was the most important surface of a home. Spanish became my first language.
Think about starting your description of the school in the Bronx the same way you started your description of the school in Guayaquil. How did you look? Where were you standing? What did the school look like? Paint me a picture. loud, obnoxious and rude is how I would describe my classroom for the first time in Bronx, New york. "take your seats everyone, the lesson is about to start", His voice sounded stressed and tired but with a whole lot of experience, he was tall and scary looking, at that moment I just wanted to return to my sweet old country. Judging the book by its cover is what I did , Mr Ramos had a strong attitude. The above information needs to be broken up into separate sentences. You have a major run-on sentence!! He showed me how to stand up for what I really want and knowing that I was a young girl coming from a different country he understood my position " ohhhhhh mine, I was in your shoes one day, don't let go of that discipline and education you got over there not everyone is that lucky, I see you have been thought very well, you a very bright young lady" When and where did he say this to you? What was the situation? Further explanation is needed here. I will never forget this words they've made me the young lady I am today. I remembered all those words Mr.Ramos said and all the things Ms.Irrizary did for me and only those things will get me through the days at PS.60.
You might want to emphasize a little more what were the things you learned from each of the teachers. What do you take from them that you want to become when you are a teacher?
On my steps to becoming a Early childhood Education teacher I will apply this skills, I want to be just like them other than bringing diversity I want to bring change to the Education field. This two teachers from different countries shaped who I want to be in the future, I want my students to learn more than just English and math. I want them to learn all about discipline and respect. Why is discipline and respect so important for elementary-school students to learn? What specifically are you taking from Ms. Irrizary and whar specifically are you taking from Mr. Ramos? Again, more description is needed here. As I got older I understood that respect and discipline give you alot of advantages in life, I want to be able to pass it around to kids being that at a very young age kids should be leaning all this things in school so they can learn how to cherish them and keep them forever. My school years at Santa Maria Goretti in Guayaquil, Ecuador and PS.60 made me see education in a different way.
Born in Florida in 1993 and taken to the beautiful country of Ecuador in October of that year, educated there until the age of 9. I came to New York for my first time, with a lot of dreams and hopes, but with a lot of fear. Thinking, how will i adapt to this new life that i was about to start? Growing up in Ecuador and going to school over there made me different from a child being raised here in the United States. I was raised in a unique way in which manners, family and education was the most important surface of a home. Spanish became my first language.